Saturday, November 25, 2017

Fractured by Amanda K. Dudley-Penn

Strength is just an illusion only seen when you are bare. 
Pride is the cloak that is sewed and you are forced to wear.
Breathing in and breathing out waiting for the ball to drop.
Keeping your mouth shut while your brain screams please stop.  
Spinning in circles, everyone is more important than you.  
You are the daughter of a dark mind that part is true.  
Do you step in his footsteps? No one thinks you'll play his game.
That mask is a lie but they'll believe it just the same.
Because it makes them feel comfortable and they won't have to see
That maybe the spinning thoughts and darkness live inside of me.
Thought to be tougher than the others but that's just a lie.
So they won't have to see that weakness inside.
Does it make them feel less guilty so they don't have to take the blame?
Or is it because if they knew, they would have to admit they are insane?
Whispers in the darkness...Whispers that I later hear.
Do you think they don't tell me when you whisper about me in their ears?
I know more than they do...I know more than they speak.  
I know I was a pawn and they played with me.  
Yet what they see about me is all just manufactured.  
Because they only see the slivers, the part of me that is fractured.

  

Friday, November 10, 2017

Dark Spot by Amanda K. Dudley-Penn

Twisting through life not invisible but barely there.
Broken and Beaten and touched with penetrating stares. 
Acknowledged in speech but ignored in presence. 
But oh how hard are all these life lessons.
No chance of pride...No chance of conceit. 
Putting a bandage on when the heart bleeds.
Blending with darkness.  Faded to most.
Even in accomplishments, there is nothing to boast.
Looking out a window, nothing is there.
The mantra is that life is never fair.
Trembling lips and tear filled eyes.
Hidden behind all of those pretty lies.
Standing in a storm, the wind whipping around
Knowing without a doubt that no one is proud.
Used for the gift to push others far.
It doesn't matter as long they are stars.
Forcing a smile, Give it all you got.
They all wear white and you are just a dark spot.